British Spy Foils Russian Attempt at Solar Domination

According to the New York Times, Russia has blamed their latest botched attempt at a Mars moon landing on solar radiation, completing avoiding the topic of British spies–a notable omission. The vessel, the latest in a series of five, splash-landed in the pacific on January 15th. Seeking Russian opinions on the matter, RIA Novosti (a state-operated news agency) cited an industry official’s opinion that claims about radiation were “absurd.”

The Times article does not specify that the Russians were attempting to launch a space-based EMP weapon, nor does it specify that one James Bond, of Her Majesty’s Secret Service, was responsible for sabotaging this latest mission. But it seems pretty obvious that’s what happened.

Mr. Bond could not be reached for comment.

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